Monday, November 14, 2011

Meet my potential dulhans

My trip to India was exhilarating and enjoyable, thankfully all went as per plan without any glitches or unwanted nuances. I was a lot apprehensive before flying as I would be with my folks after long and did not want any twitch in the already fragile relationships but thankfully apart from few ignorable smirks it all went smoothly and I am thankful for it. Travelling across cities I observed that Indian metros are changing a lot and that too very rapidly and for someone visiting motherland after more than a year, this change was all too evident; however keeping the bustling metro life aside I completed a hectic tour of Bangalore, Gurgaon and also stopped at few other smaller cities. Besides I also managed to shop, call old folks, visit Vaishno Devi and yes somewhere also stole a date with an old flame from college days (over cold beer she seemed all the more hotter). But more importantly I was on a dulhan ki khoj this time and this is where all the action lay as I interacted with a few girls this time. Was it fun? Take your guess as you read below

Girl 1
I met this girl at a marriage bureau in Bangalore, she smiled a lot and was crackling with energy in her slim frame and white salwar suit. This chick was a contrast of my reserved disposition and seemed too bubbly, chirpy and a bit pimply for my liking; yes she was all that and more as she smiled bit too much for no reason. The most interesting part of her was her father who looked like a villain from South Indian films in his white kurta pyjama and super dark complexion; whats more he even spoke like a villain when he asked me in his masala dosa accent “whaaatzz your ssaalarieee?” I really pity the guy who will have him as his father-in-law

Girl 2
This girl was the surprise pack of tour as this meeting was fixed only few days after my arrival, Mom and myself had to travel up north to meet this chick and her folks. This was a somewhat decent family though of modest means, the girl was young and working in Pune though her small town upbringing was all too evident. She had a very portly figure and was very nervous when we were left to talk alone. Had she been a bit slimmer and maybe smarter (or sexier) call here would have been different, but I am not very sure if a small town Tun Tun can be a good fit for me

Girl 3
Now this was like an old classic Doordarshan serial, we had travelled to an old South Indian town to see this girl but never knew about the awaiting surprise. The girl’s house seemed as if it had never seen Nerolac paint and appeared more of a clean cow shed than a living place with red brickstones and huge walls. This was a very traditional family and even more traditional house, it seemed as if I was visiting some ashram; also this girl’s father looked like a servant as for long I couldn’t place who that slum dweller seated on the nearby wooden chair really was. The girl on her part was too excited and could not stop talking when she was left alone to talk with me, when I told her I had studied at Hindu College she told me she had heard about this College located near a temple in Delhi! Seeing her and her house reminded me of Gandhi’s vision for India, he would have been proud of their family

Girl 4
Now this is what happens when you meet a hip metro girl after small towners. Have you ever tasted cappuccino after drinking filter coffee for long? The difference between new and old India is so amazing and was starkly evident when I met this attitude girl at a posh Bangalore hotel after having met all other low maintenance and less complicated chicks that I was completely caught off guard. This proposal was one of the best that I had received so far, coming from a well to do and close family friends who had been chasing us for more than two years. However after the meeting I am not sure who was more disappointed as I was completely taken by surprise by this girl’s approach. She asked about my job, career and future plans in minutest details and it was she who was always in command of our conversation. Coming from a very wealthy family I could easily detect her liberal upbringing and affluent lifestyle, which makes me all the more unsure if this will be the best match for me. What was more demeaning was her parting line at end of our talk “We will let you know”. Now I don’t think I was appearing for a job interview here

After meeting all these girls I am back to square one and also back to Muscat, not sure when I will get hitched. But who is in a hurry? After all marriages are made in heaven and suffered on earth


  1. I would go with your old flame from college dude.

  2. Only 4? Not likely to meet THE one this way

  3. ya khuda , mere bhi din bus aane waale hai

  4. haha... so the 'biodata exchange' for u has begun huh?
    what was refreshing is that you didn't try to hide what u were actually thinking even though many women reading this might go a lil 'hawwwww jee' :P

    and the whole interview bit in the arranged marriage scenario does kill the romantic in us. feels more like a business transaction when the girl goes 'we will let you know'.

    And hey ! liberal upbringing is a good thing :).. keep an open mind!

  5. hahahaha. you reminded me of katrina kaif in the movie namaste london. just switch the genders of the main protagonist in the stories and both stories are almost same :P

  6. Interesting encounters with your could be....You could make a short film on it.

  7. I quite agree with Brajmohan...u really reminded me of Katrina in Namastey London. Interesting encounters u had. :P

  8. Aaaahh.... Decisions, decisions, decisions... :p

  9. pesto sweety i completely understand your dilemna..dileman cus its a decision thats gonna shape your life and your family's future, cuz the girl must learn to blend in well.but sweety being honest with you, i felt bad about you describing girl 3 's father looking like a servant...does not sound nice haina??

    but yes 4 hits is not gonna yeild any result..i met 5 charlies before G and it came after a yaer of search..

    waise pune waali girl sounds fun..too motu kya ??

  10. Ahh.. the girl hunt!!I know hundreds of stories abt boy hunt.. so this was quite interesting. it will happen when it has to happen.. meanwhile just enjoy the process!

  11. Lol I loved this post and the last line simply rocks!

  12. Whoa!!!! Girl hunting full-on!!?? How weird does it feel to meet random strangers thinking that you may end up spending your life with one of them?

  13. Small town tun tun?? Poor girl will commit suicide if she happens to read this :P.
    Anyways u are back to square one. Wonder what the girls would have written about thr expeerience with u :D
    God knws!
    Last line ....about marriages being suffered on earth..EPIC!

  14. Going by this bl0g post, i wonder who will find you a suitable match, given that you seem to have no respect for women and their families? there is a difference between humour and bad-mouthing!also, just when a sophisticated city-girl turns the tables on you and asks you a few questions, you are clearly uncomfortable. I bet she passed you over!

    This is not a personal quarrel but only what your writing evinces about you. a blog is personal space but its for public viewing; please be responsible about what you write.

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  16. Hahaha thank you soooo much for posting this blog! I wish you'd allow people to see what you look like so everyone reading this can associate your cunt-ness with a face! But what can you expect from a guy that talks shit about humble women behind their backs? For someone who calls their home "motherland" it's embarrassing how terrible you talk about it and it's people (girls, fathers, the less-wealthy..where do you stop?). It's funny how you talk about your old flame being hotter after a cold beer, a)you picked her the first time b)are you that desperate that you still tried a date with her knowing you didn't find her attractive in the first place? Is someone tired of stroking out his own pesto sauce? Here are observations for you:
    Girl 1: she is smiling for "no reason" because you are boring her.
    Girl 2: Tun and you call yourself a man?
    Girl 3: Should we take your view as a representation of all wealthy Indians?
    Girl 4: It is an interview, otherwise it would not be set up. When is a date not some form of an interview? "we will let you know" classic. please post her reply, I think we'd all enjoy to read that. Demeaning? yes i think you are an expert of the word. quick question, does your mother and father pay for your meal on these dates/meetings?

    Some constructive criticism:
    1. learn humility and stop embarrassing yourself
    2. if you have a problem with this system, have the balls to stand up and not practice it. 4 girls and none you like, should be a sign.
    3. (save you the traveling)
    4. a majority of the Indian women I've met were amazingly beautiful and interesting regardless of the background they came from. stop bitching.
    5. Be a man of wealth, but also one of Value.

    I hope you're man enough to leave this post up, but thank you again for the laugh.

    I never waste my time replying to these blogs, but when it comes to disgracing women and making men look like pigs, I have to say something.

    feel free to reply, honestly

  17. In addition to the interesting observations of quickpin i would just like to add a few more:
    1.) The dad asked you about your salary because obviously there was not much else to you or your face.
    2.)Small town tun tun? You live in Muscat you fool. Small town tun tuns are probably the only female faces you will ever see.
    3.)With an attitude like yours you will probably end up losing your virginity the other way around.
    4.)We will let you know? She's way too smart hot or rich for you and the date was obviously a mistake so get back with the ex who looks better once you ve knocked a few down.
    5.) Your writing is so bad i really think you should forget trying to be creative in English. Just stick to being your vernacular self.

  18. girl #4 yea...thumbs up..haha

  19. oh my! i usually never read other people's comments but for some reason I did today and boy some of them are so harsh!!

    4 girls in one trip is a lot less if you want to get hitched the arranged marriage way.. good luck with your search!

  20. Hi pesto sauce,
    Visited your blog after ages. :)
    had a good laugh because I so relate to this post..I should actually do a post on 'dulha hunt.' :D
    Good post except that I was a little taken aback by the way you described girl 3's father.