Sunday, January 31, 2010

Ten Things That Make Me Happy

I am not much into tags, but since this one was given by one of my favorite bloggers I had to oblige. I have tried to list down things that make me happy though it was not easy to evoke the times when grass actually looks green and sky blue

Chatting with friends over booze – this one tops the list; nothing beats those evenings spent boozing with old and new pals. I do not get to booze much, one of the drawbacks of not staying alone, but I do fairly compensate quantity for frequency

Getting appreciation/recognition – we all like adulation and I am no different. Getting recognized at work or outside indeed makes everyone happy

Sex and porn – now who doesn’t like having sex, some get it easily, some get it early and some make a fortune out of doing it. I yearn for those growing up days when inhibitions were less and curiosity high. I also like surfing porn on my laptop, last night I discovered some clips of Mia Zittoli, check her out she is undeniably erotic

Intellectual chats – I have always valued grey cells more than other personality aspects, perhaps one reason I am still single. I love discussing current affairs, political events, economic issues; anything which stimulates and makes me think hard

Outside work interests – last few years I have joined forums like Toastmasters and Art of Living which do keep me positively occupied and engaged. I have made some good friends there with whom I share many common interests and hobbies

Freedom from bondage – ask me what it means to be deprived of adult freedom and being caged all life. I do manage my little escapes now and then, which become sources of much elation for me

Looking down a valley – this may look a bit strange but I like looking down a valley and taking in its scenic beauty. Its calming and peaceful

Blogging – I was reading blogs for some years and had made a feeble attempt writing one myself many years back. But this blog is for sure my best friend, after all who can give so much solace and ask for nothing in return

Music – I always need to have music playing somewhere; either FM radio, car stereo or my laptop. Choices depend on mood though I relish all varieties from bhajans to oldies to new music videos

Reminiscing good old days – catching up with college friends and recalling those crazy days when nothing could go wrong, who doesn’t like it? Or recounting those foolishnesses with guys you have grown up with every time you meet, doesn’t that make you happy? Atleast it makes me pleased and cheerful

I am not tagging anyone here though whosoever wishes to take this up is welcome.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Mujhe Iss Shopping Se Bachao

This Saturday I had been to Big Bazaar for a weekend sale; not that I wanted to go but was thrust upon to accompany my folks who were enamored by the huge weekend discounts. Shopping has never been my cup of tea and as far as I know retail therapy heals lesser number from my gender. Also shopping demands loads of patience more so from a nerdy like me who prefers cafes, beers bars or bookstores over congested malls any day

The scene inside Big Bazaar was nothing short of a stampede what with everyone jostling and pushing around for a larger share for themselves. Initially I found the entire frenzy around to be deeply bugging and quickly moved out but later settled for some purchases in the men’s section. What was most disgusting were the huge billing queues, apparently billing takes largest chunk of time and if the billing machine halts for whatever reason, you actually feel like pulling your hair out

Later we went for lunch to Haldirams which was no less chaotic with large waiting time for seats. Seeing the entire mess around, I wondered is there actually a recession going on and what will happen when boom times return? I guess we guys are not so much affected by these stupid economic situations and can get easily swayed by any type of discounts

After lunch there was another bout of shopping and by the time day finished well into the evening, my head was spinning, limbs throbbing and I longed for the safe refuge of my bed. Even after a long nap, the throbbing at back of head still persisted which did not abate even by bedtime. I was left cursing as to why I opted for this arduous shopping over my relaxed café outing but nevertheless saluted and admired the strong steadfast Indian shopper

If you ask me will I ever repeat this visit? Never

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Years Gone By

As another year unfolds and gets underway with all its colors, it marks the onset of not only another year but also another decade. I was reminiscing how the past decade has been for me with its own share of ups and downs and perhaps the coming decade will be no less eventful. Also each year of the decade gone by had its own uniqueness for me, which I have tried to summarize succinctly below

2000
It was the year of innocence, a young lad from a small city finding his feet in big bad Delhi and adjusting to hitherto unseen environs of Hindu College. Also getting over my first infatuation and finding grips with life of a grown-up. I spoke to Malaika Arora from MTV Loveline this year (and she found me to be a despo)

2001
Salad days of my life, as I was enjoying college and its freedom to the hilt. Life was perhaps never better with full on masti and mazaa, playing Agony Uncle to friends in romance, enjoying Delhi and its girls, wondering why college cannot be extended by another three years. Only wish those days could return again, not that I would spend them any different

2002
Perhaps one of the worst years of my life as I lost my father and that grief still haunts. For many days I felt like pricks throbbing all over my body with the pain refusing to go away. This year I realized that life will never be the same again

2003
A forgettable year as I was stuck doing my MBA from a place I loathed. These were the loneliest years of my life, inspite of having rich brats all around and some hot females readily available. Most friendless time indeed

2004
We moved to Gurgaon and I got my first job. Working was indeed a new way of life for me and my first job with its accompanying lessons taught me many unforgettable lessons in professionalism. Since this was a young firm with young workforce I did have a good time with babes and Bacardi. I also had my first smoke this year

2005
Difficulties in my job had begun to unfold which I left later in the year. However I will remember this time for the wonderful phone sex I used to have with an unkown chick. I had mistakenly received an SMS which initiated a long sensual phone chat which continued over a few months. Will recount those chats sometime later but I discovered phone sex to be indeed stimulating

2006
This year will be remembered as I joined my present firm, got a major bout of illness which refused to go away and things at home took a turn for the worse. Perhaps I should have got away that year only and wouldn’t have been stuck here today

2007
I joined Art of Living and found solace in it away from the tensions present around. Perhaps this was the first of many spiritual sojourns I undertook and I am yet not stopped

2008
I will remember this year most for its frustrations, I was not getting a job offer as per my liking and when I did get markets had crashed. Now I have realized we all are only slaves of the market/economy

2009
A better year for me as I started this blog, joined pursuits outside office, workplace got better and yes I slept with a whore. Compared to previous years this one did show some respite and can be remembered for some good things

As 2010 unfolds I have hopes of things looking up what with a change of location in the offing but dearly hope it should not turn to be another disappointment

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Dilli Ki Sardi

Winters are here and making their presence felt quite chillingly. Till December it was not so cold but the onset of New Year has brought down temperatures in Delhi drastically. I am not a big fan of winters but am not very averse to them either, perhaps having been raised in Kashmir I am fairly accustomed to the chills. However winters are different from other parts of the year in more ways than one

Woolens: being a stuffed toy is nobody’s dream existence and woolens actually make you feel like one. The multiple layers that increase with the decrease in temperature often give you a feeling of being wrapped with soft balls around. Must be tougher for cleavage displayers to keep their assets shrouded

Gloom: if summers are associated with bright sunny days, winters make for dull and dreary appearance. At times it seems as if Polaroid images have been robbed of their color and everything around appears to be in shades of grey

Laziness: I curse mornings when I have to get up early. It takes a good time for me to get off bed even after my eyes have opened and I simply linger around in bed, hoping for the clock to stop. Also these days gym has stopped and only possible activity is razai main ladayee

Fog: winters in Delhi are incomplete with out those misty layers around. It was fun in school, boys and girls touched around unchecked in morning assembly but not when you have to reach office on time. I pity those who travel this month, its certain that their schedules will get disrupted.

Shags: it’s very difficult to shag in this icy climate, no matter how hard you try or what you do. Unlike girls, no props can be used for enhanced intensity and the absence of sun does not help the hormones at all. Also one has to carefully optimize the attained crescendo, not letting it slip away

Watery bowels: if you are exposed to the chill for long and have a weak digestion, chances are you will feel those slurring sounds in your stomach. It is crucial to keep your body warm, more so the middle portion to avoid embarrassments.

Perhaps freezing winters will continue relentlessly in January with out respite, after all tadpaye tarsaye re dilli ki sardi

Friday, January 8, 2010

I wanna break free

These days there is a new ad on air of an insurance firm which depicts a young boy being seen off by his parents while departing on a train journey. The parents are very protective of their son and give him all advices and comfort inside the rail compartment and caution him excessively to take care. Seated across on the other berth is a young pretty girl with a book in hand, who is blushing at the parents of a grown-up boy being so protective for him and the boy is visibly embarrassed to be treated like a kid in front of a hot chick. The ad begins with parents pamepring their kid inside the rail compartment and ends with them throwing bananas on the boy’s lap from the platform outside; all through the ad the boy is speechless and embarrassed while the girl, about same age as the boy, is enjoying the show of a pampered kid.

I never see this ad fully and either look away or flip the channel. That scene is too close to my own life, having been treated like a kid inspite of maturing in age and never allowed to see the world from my own eyes. Like the boy in the ad, I too have been embarrassed many times in front of peers and like the boy denied freedom which I see many teenagers commonly enjoy these days.

All my life I have been restricted and markedly sheltered; if you don’t believe me, then judge yourself: never been to school or college in public transport; not allowed to drive till I revolted a couple of years back; never rode a bicycle; still have driver dropping me off to office; not allowed to go out alone even now; during hostel life had a valet along; no friends coming over during teenage; never played a sport for I may get hurt!

I guess it is not very difficult to imagine why I have become a sort of recluse now and till a year back, remained confined, listless and sometimes lifeless. Perhaps it is for these reasons I have been long harboring ambitions to get away to a place far away; different people, different city and maybe a different country. In a way I am fortunate for it is now unambiguously clear that I will have to build my castle on a distant shore rather than continue to pity myself at my dilapidated condition amidst restricted environs here. I know my time will come when I will be far and away but the million dollar question remains: when?

Bachpan to gaya, jawani bhi gayi
Ek pal to humein, ab jeene do jeene do

Monday, January 4, 2010

An Open Letter to Life

Dear Life

You have amazed me often and you continue to do so unabated. I have never been able to unravel you, understand you or fathom all you have. Whenever I have thought that I have you all sorted out, you have come back at me and startled me with your bag of magic tricks.

You remain a mystery to me with its own twists and turns. When I thought nothing will go wrong, I have seen me going downhill; when nearly all was lost I have risen again from nowhere. When looking for a new dawn the dark night has many times prolonged and when bracing for trouble unexpected glory has been bestowed.

I know I have been guilty of taking you for granted and have never given you the accolades you so richly deserve. Also I have only looked at your faults and ignored your goodness, which you have been so selfless to share with me. I also know the cribbing about faults and flaws has been one-sided; you have generously overlooked my anomalies time and again.

You have made me aware that you are not my only accomplice, others’ lives are also intertwined with my own irrespective if I like or not. I have planned my own escape routes many times but then there is your near relative called Destiny who like you has more surprises and shocks up his sleeve. But I must admit that my pursuit here remains relentless and sooner than later I will find my own heaven.

My journey with you has also included many crazy and unimaginable events, which I have only mindlessly initiated. Here I know I often wrongly blame you, after all I will have to bear the consequences of my choices. You have made me conscious, sometimes harshly, that I am only a farmer who is to meant to toil and struggle and will reap only what he sows

I wonder at times if you have been fair to me or not, if you have given me more surprises than asked for, if you have burdened me with too much. But you have always given me what I deserve and never what I desire; and in a way I am thankful to you for it for it has made me realize as to where I have been wrong

But unmindful of the love-hate relationship we share, I have always and always adored you. No matter what you have done to me you have never, I repeat never, denied me hope for which I am grateful and always shone the light at the end of tunnel, though many times it has turned out to be only an illusion. I don’t know how longer you will entertain me and when our incredible voyage will end but I must whole heartedly thank you for all you have done, all you have been and all you have stood for

Love you always
Pesto Sauce