Tuesday, February 14, 2012

What matters most ?

For all those who have been in a long term relationship or have survived in one for a good time there is bound to be a glue which would have held their fragile world together. I have never been in one so cannot answer but if I think hard some of them maybe:

Passion/spark: for a life long attraction to sustain there has to be an attracting force which is dark and intense to last a lifetime. For all you know this may be something evil also, after all girls are known to like bad boys, but the dark passion should be sustainable and attractable for a life time. Darker the passion, greater the intensity and attraction

Dedication: trust and loyalty are bedrocks of any relationship; let it be romantic, official or criminal. However it should also be borne in mind that trust is fragile and should be handled with care, once broken its hard to repair and cracks will be visible for a lifetime

Chemistry: lack of chemistry makes it hard to hide the apparent discomfort, look at Abhi Ash for instance. If chemistry has to be defined it has to be the sparkle in the eye or the synchronous body language complimenting each other; couples who are really close make love often (and enjoy doing so) after effects of which are visible even the morning after

Communication: now we are talking business. Imagine a relationship with no communication or worse no open communication. The modern lifestyle is already breeding many dysfunctional families and complicated relations and one has to be alert not to get lost in this maze. Use Airtel or MTNL but do communicate

Tastes: this is more important to gel together. Imagine an avid reader lost in a mall, he will skip Gucci and Versace and only hunt for the desolate book shop; similarly a classic music lover would still try to attend a concert in Vienna even if he is holidaying there for a short trip. Now imagine spending lifetime with someone who doesn’t understand or appreciate your side of story

Sense of humor: I am not very sure of this as sadly I don’t have much of it but somewhere it is important to be cheery and smiling as life sails through

Sex Appeal: certainly not most important but it does matter or maybe matters till menopause doesn’t arrive

I am not very sure how many of above really matter, what I know is that love and respect matter first and foremost


  1. Yes u r right abt each one of them...the not so magical ingredients that make a relationship work...I say not so magical coz its u who has to work on all these factors and it doesnt work by itself!

  2. Only pure...unadulterated love matters!

  3. Can't disagree you.
    All the points that you mentioned here are needed to keep the relationship going.

  4. You've hit the nail.

  5. Last line nailed it :D
    And whole post too ( been in long relation to say that :D)

  6. I think its a mix of all of it, but without chemistry very difficult to sustain any of it

  7. I think it is a mix of all of it too...with emphasis on communication and chemistry (my opinion). A sense of humour wouldn't hurt either :)

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  9. I think the main one would be be the dedication. Things likes tastes and passion can change over time, but if you choose to commit yourself to another person, that is the strongest glue there is.


  10. YES, all this matters. Kya aapne phd in relationships ki hai Sir!?! hain! heheh

    nice post

  11. You certainly have jotted down a good list. Commitment is also another important point although one could say that is the same as dedication. Some parameters regarding these points will change and shuffle over time but yes, if they still strike a good balance, everything works out in the long term.

  12. Hope is my favorite. The gift from Pandora's box