Phases of my life

Everyone’s life has its own crests and troughs, times when you feel you are on top of the world and next day you land up in pits. My life too has been a bit rollercoaster with its own thrills when swing is high and bad pain when rock bottom hits. If I have to look back at my thirty years of existence, I can may be categorize them into different phases

Young toddler: I was so shy and innocent that I sometimes wonder where that young pup has gone. My parents were reticent shouting at me or disciplining me for I would cow down with tears immediately. A true blue ghar ki murgi I knew nothing about bad world outside

The ugly duckling adolescent: this was the time I went to a school hostel and understood why growth is associated with loss of innocence. I was bullied heavily and found life with creatures from other habitats very tough; it was here I learnt how to masturbate and also got my first blowjob

Suppressed teenager: I was back home during high school but now feel living in that small town missed out on mischief. Plus my distant cousin, whom I was seeing for the first time in my life, had come to stay at my place to study along with me which was much against my wishes; from here on I started finding little difference between my parents and aliens

Freebird romantic: moving to Delhi was not bad at all and life in Hindu College was indeed fun. Most carefree days of my life where future was a dream deferred and stars in my eyes could make up a constellation of their own

Agonized loner: I lost my father soon after college after which life was never the same again. Also I ended up doing my PG at a place I loathed and never wanted to join. This was the time I despise most in my life as I remained mostly aloof, friendless and listless

First steps: one never forgets first kiss likewise one never forgets first employment also. Looking back my first couple of jobs were not that bad also, I did have my share of babes and Bacardi though also learnt some hard lessons unfortunately the hard way

Frustrated: when I started this blog I was so damn frustrated and itching to get away; read my initial posts which reek of angst and frustration to better understand my despair. Had this phase continued for some more time my own sanity would have been in grave danger, seriously

Relief and hope: I am more relieved than happy to be away and abroad now; uncomplicated life here does show a glimmer of hope after being tormented and caged for long