Destined to Doom?

Last week I received an unexpected call from Dubai; it was from the same firm which had offered me employment last year only to withdraw it later at last minute, just days before departure, leaving me high and dry. That time I was totally heartbroken, but they had promised to reconsider me again once the global crisis subsides. Now with economy on the bend, the call thrilled me no end and after one year of long wait was all the more sweet. This firm is one of the leading retail electronic chains in the Gulf and the position on offer this time is based out of Muscat. I was told to meet their HR head travelling to Delhi next week and inshallah I will be with them soon. What was ironical was that this call came on same day and same time as last year, when the dirty call withdrawing the offer had come

After receiving this call my joy and happiness knew no bounds, for a year of hope and perseverance had finally paid off; but I did not know bad and unexpected news lurks around the corner. On Friday morning I glanced at the news papers in office mentioning Dubai debt crisis and I smelled trouble. The next day’s headlines screamed of Dubai sinking and I knew my dreams were in danger. As the crisis intensified I too had a sinking feeling and the uncertainty gripping the Gulf started engulfing me as well

By Monday I was in such a stinking foul mood that I felt like smashing window panes and actually drinking someone’s blood. I was cautious that I should not irk anybody around for I could have really killed someone that day. Why does it happen with me that whenever a good career prospect comes either Wall Street crashes or Dubai goes into tailspin? For the past three years I have dreamt of living alone in a big city, have my own friends, get my first girlfriend, enjoy life on my own but this fucking fluctuating global economy has time and again put paid to my hopes

Last year I could not sleep well for three days after the debacle and it is very painful this time too, to see the ecstasy prolonged for happen and in next few days inexplicably turn to agony. Imagine you have waited for one call for an entire year and when finally you do receive that call, the entire thrill gets shaken if not shattered in next couple of days by a totally unforeseen eventuality. I met their HR honcho yesterday and they have promised me again a good offer with joining in January, but never know if globally things may change till then. Before leaving I asked if Dubai crisis will have any impact on them, which was brushed off as a non-matter the same way they had done last year, as if Lehman collapse will have no effect whatsoever.

I sometimes wonder if I should reconcile to my fate and my job and believe that things better are not made for me; for even if I do get something, unexpected forces will wean it away? Or maybe perhaps my destiny is to never fly high and continue with my meager earning. As of now I have decided to wait till January and watch things closely and only then decide if the promised Eden does happen or am I always destined to doom?